Two West Virginian’s were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer. After a while the first West Virginian says to the second, 'If I was to sneak over to your house and make love to your wife while you was off huntin' and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us related?'

The second West Virginian cocked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, 'Well, I don't know about related, but it sure would make us even.'

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This guy was watching TV as his wife was out cutting the grass during the hot summer. He finally worked up the energy to go out and ask his wife what was for supper.

Well, his wife was quite irritated about him sitting in the air-conditioned house all day while she did all the work, so she scolded him. "I can't believe you're asking me about supper right now! Imagine I'm out of town, go inside and figure dinner out for yourself."

So, he went back in the house and fixed himself a big steak, with potatoes, garlic bread and tall glass of iced tea.

The wife finally walked in about the time he was finishing up and asked him, "You fixed something to eat? So where is mine?"

"Huh? I thought you were out of town."

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Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk, ”I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled”.

To which she replied. “No, it’s regular porn, you sick bastard”