>--- These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are
>things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now
>published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while
>these exchanges were actually taking place.
>
>ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
>WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
>______________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
>WITNESS: July 18th.
>ATTORNEY: What year?
>WITNESS: Every year.
>_____________________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
>WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
>______________________________________
>
>
>ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
>WITNESS: Yes.
>ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
>WITNESS: I forget.
>ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
>_____________________________________
>
>
>ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
>WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
>ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
>WITNESS: Forty-five years.
>_____________________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
>sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
>
>WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
>___________________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
>WITNESS: Yes.
>ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
>WITNESS: None.
>ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
>______________________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
>WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
>ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
>______________________________________
>
>ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on
>dead people?
>WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
>
>ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
>WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
>ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
>WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
>doing an autopsy on him!
>______________________________________
>
>
>ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
>for a pulse?
>WITNESS: No.
>ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
>WITNESS: No.
>ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing?
>WITNESS: No.
>ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when
>you began the autopsy?
>WITNESS: No.
>ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
>WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
>ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
>WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
>practicing law