1. The dumbest, most useless thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.

2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.

3. In 2019: Stay away from negative people. In 2020: Stay away from positive people.

4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house and told my
cat. We laughed a lot.

6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom. (Don't believe them.)

7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet ... or should we just only keep washing our hands?

8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars, and keep men at home!

9. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!

10. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the backyard. I’m getting tired of the living room.

12. The analogy "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now” is like saying “The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now.”

13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.

14. The spread of the corona-virus is based on two things:
… How dense the population is.
… How dense the population is.

quote:

13. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.

That one just kills me!


.

One of the best humor posts in ages!

More jokes, less pokes. Funny will keep ya sane, Kensco.

2020 Is a Bust!!

Yeah, as per #1 I bought my wife a daily planner on new years; what a waste of money; she has left the house 3 times. I totally agree with # 14, idiots that won't comply because they don't want to be told what to do + have no regard or respect for anyone else.