A little humor to start off the week, have a great day!
�
AUTO REPAIR A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the
mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes it is idling
smoothly. She says "What's the story?"� He replies "Just crap in the carburetor." She
asks "How often do I have to do that?"

SPEEDING TICKET A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks
her very nicely to see her license. She replied in a huff "I wish you guys
would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and
then today you expect me to show it to you!"

EXPOSURE A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and
her right breast hanging out. The officer asks her if she is aware that
she could be arrested for indecent exposure. She says "Why, officer?"
"Because your breast is hanging out." He says. She looks down and says "OH MY
GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!"

RIVER WALK There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts.
"How can I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up then down the river
and shouts back "You ARE on the other side."

KNITTING A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
freeway. He was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was
knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and
siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his siren and yelled
"PULL OVER!" The blonde yelled back "NO!! IT'S A SCARF!"

BLONDE ON THE SUN A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking
one day. The Russian said 'We were the first in space!" The American
said "We were the first on the moon!" The Blonde said "So what? We're going to
be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the
Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid you know.� We're going at
night!"

IN A VACUUM A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her
turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question
was: "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked "Is it on or off?"

FINAL EXAM The blonde reported for her university final examination
that consists of yes/no type questions. She takes her seat in the
examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit
of inspiration, takes out her purse, removes a coin and starts tossing
the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes for Heads and No for Tails. Within
half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still
sweating it out. During the last few minutes she is seen desperately throwing the
coin, muttering and sweating. The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks
what is going on. "I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm
rechecking my answers."