There are two statues in a park; one of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life.
The angel tells them: "As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you've wished to do the most."
He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running off together behind the shrubbery. The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of breath and laughing.
The angel tells them: "Um, you have fifteen minutes left!"
The male statue asks the woman statue, "Would you like to do it again?"
"Oh, yes, let's," she replies!
"But let's change positions," she continues.
"This time, I'll hold the pigeon down, and you crap on its head."
Posts: 19594 | Location: The LOST Nation | Registered: 27 March 2001
I think that you have a sense of humor that a man can relate to. Probably why you're also liked on other threads in this forum. I still say "you people" are dangerous and it was a big mistake to let you vote! I will now go into my bomb shelter until the incoming fire stops!
Posts: 649 | Location: NY | Registered: 15 January 2004
I had three brothers. Long after my dad passed on, my mother told me that he had expressed a regret that he never had a daughter. I told her I wished it too. (I was the youngest) My beloved mother said that I just wanted a sister so I could bully her. You women always assume the worst! Anyway, a girl who survives in a family of boys has something going for her!
Posts: 649 | Location: NY | Registered: 15 January 2004
What about a boy surviving in a family with 5 older sisters? I will spare you the gruesome details of my childhood. You would be psychologically scarred for the rest of your life. Lets just say it is no surprize I joined the Army to blow things up.
Posts: 3156 | Location: Rigby, ID | Registered: 20 March 2004
Don't give us this nonsense about "gruesome details of your childhood". You were getting real expert, inside advice about how to deal with girls right from the very beginning. The rest of us went through the hard school of experience. You had the way greased for you. So knock off this c..p.
Posts: 649 | Location: NY | Registered: 15 January 2004
Somebody finally found me out!!! Despite their cruelty they did give me the inside track. Clear into college I was set for knowing just the right thing to do or say. But just when I thought I had women all figured out I went and married one who had her own set of rules. And she keeps changing them!!!
But if you think it was all easy street you are so very wrong. Just imagine your older sister threatening to narc you out to your parents for something that would require very harsh consequences. And in order to avoid said confrontation you have to go to the store and purchase her immediately required feminine products. Then to up the embarrassment the only open check out is a new girl from school you have been wanting to ask out very badly but havent had the chance to yet. And to make it even worse the evil sister gave you no money for degrading purchase and you have to pay from your own pocket to be publicly huniliated.
Above event was real but does have a happy ending. Checkout girl thought it was sweet that a brother would do that for sister and is so impressed she asked me out first the next day at school.
Posts: 3156 | Location: Rigby, ID | Registered: 20 March 2004
