I was out in the hills the other day on my get-fit programme when I spied a big ginger cat sitting in a sunny spot on a hillside . He was going for it licking his asshole for all it was worth . After what seemed like half an hour of this serious activity it suddenly dawned on me what was happening here - he had just eaten an Australian and was desperately trying to get the taste out of his mouth...

In Australia, we have a plague of sabre-toothed field mice that are about about 4 inches long including tail and will stand right up on their hind legs and give you rude gestures with their wee forefingers after they have taken a bite out of every piece of your food in your house.



To own a 50/70 rifle such as mine, you have to show the authorities a genuine need and a genuine reason to possess such a 'weapon'. Control of agricultural pests is an acceptable excuse! Be sure to load the biggest bullet possible.



I shot my first one some 26 years ago at a range of 4 feet, with a 300gn bullet from a 375H&H but only wounded it and a second shot was needed to put it down. Don't underestimate the Aussie sabre-toothed field mouse, they can carry their own weight in lead and then some!



I figure a 540gn from the 50/70 would not only kill these tenacious critters but after passing through their body would dig a trench big enough to bury it. This would also be enviornmentally sustainable management as one shot would do the whole job thus reducing noise pollution and minimising smoke pollution to the atmosphere!



(Footnote: Even big ginger cats migrate to New Zealand for the quiet life, truth be known, he was probably licking the puncture marks left in his arse by an Aussie field mouse! Hence the old saying, "many kiwi's are just big pussies" )

No he was just preparing his tongue for when you picked him up and he get give your face a big friendly licking.

Muzza, you need to spend more time in the Small Game Forum learning how to deal with Field Lions! derf

derf I already spend more than enough time lurking in the Field Lion forum Unfortunately I am nowhere near as inventive as some of your fellow lion specialists , but still derive much enjoyment from hunting the most dangerous of small game . I had expected far more response from the guys on the other side of the Tasman Sea , but maybe the cats behaviour is normal over there as well ???

Mate , it seemed to be serious about getting rid of the taste so I left it alone - probably still licking like crazy. All the Aussies I have tasted left a lingering aftertaste too , although they were all females....

Muzza
Ya should have shot it. Any cat two minutes from home is a dead cat in my book, We have had a big noise made about some idiot introducing foxes into the wonderful state of Tas. and rightly so they should make a big song and dance and get rid of the buggers(foxes) but we have had feral cats over here since the white man stepped onto these shores and those dear little kitties kill more of our native animals than the foxes ever will. So you should have filled it full of lead.

Yes , I recall lots of those noises at the time , not to mention whimpering and suchlike , but now is not the time or place to dwell on such things , and besides , it was all in the past and damn good fun at the time . That is what you implied by

Quote:

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OOOUUUUUWWWWWEEEEEEEEEE

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isnt it Samantha ???

So the Australian wine industry strains it's vino through sheeps wool ! Who would have thought it...

"Wet wool" - a certain dank off taste or actually smell. Also referred to as "wet dog".