NAIROBI - A cobbler suspected of sorcery was attacked and nearly lynched by outraged villagers in central Kenya yesterday after being caught having sex with a female sheep, witnesses and officials said.

Joshua Kiplagat, 36, recently returned home from New Zealand, sustained a serious head wound when the sheep's owner threw a machete at him after finding him in flagrante delicto with a prize ewe in the Rift Valley district of Bomet, they said.

He was then tied to a tree stump for five hours before being frogmarched naked with the violated ovine in tow to a police station where he confessed to several acts of bestiality that he blamed on the devil, they said.

"I was sent by the devil to do that," Kiplagat told the angry crowd.

Several people accused him of being a warlock, and one disgusted woman claimed to have seen him engaging in sex acts with a dog.

"I saw this man mounting a dog two weeks ago at around seven in the evening and I was so surprised," said the woman, who gave her name as Leah.

The bloodied shoe repairer adamantly denied allegations that he was a wizard and insisted that his affection for animals was limited to sheep.

"I only made love to the ewe twice using two condoms but I never do it regularly, at least in Kenya. I left my girlfriend, Mabel, back in Wellington and miss her wooly love." he said in his defence.

Bomet assistant district chief Paul Kikwai, who was present at the police station, expressed shock at the incident and vowed that Kiplagat would be punished although he made no comment on the villagers' actions.

"We have never seen such incidents here and we are just wondering how many other refugees returned home from NZ engage in these kind of acts," he lamented.

Hey Nitro,

I know it is no excuse but as most Kiwis have spent time exploring Australia we find it very difficult to tell the difference between an Aussie woman and a ewe. They look almost identical and the smell is very similar. Intelegence is in favour of the sheep but you can be tricked because some Aussie women go to university and manage to lift their intelkect to that of a sheep.

That poor guy in Kenya probably thought he had got lucky and found an Aussie girl on her big OE after graduating with a PHD from Monash.

Just look at what thopse poor Indonesians haver done with that poor sheep in Bali. Gave the poor ewe 20 years in jail because they thought she had smuggled some Dac in. See most humans can't tell the difference.

This is good natured fun I hope

Happy Hunting

Hamish

Ha ha Hamish. I enjoyed your reply.

I "cleverly" altered the story.

I don't understand all the excitement. This type of thing is common practice in some parts of West Virigina.

Yeah , Rootbeer , this is just the way we colonials amuse each other when the hunting stories are a little slow . Actually most kiwis quite like aussies , not to the extent that we would want one for a housepet you understand , but more in that friendly way that you keep endangered species in a zoo , and run a managed breeding program to save them from a) extinction , and b) inbreeding .......

I have to think that friend NitroX has been at his version of paintstripper again , makes him hallucinate and write drivel at an astounding rate ......

But it is good to see a fellow kiwi prepared to stand up for all that is good and give some sh*t back across the Tasman. Hamish , cobber , welcome to the fold , and keep up the good work .