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Heard in the gun shop today...
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Picture of Bakes
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Customer : Can I please get a gun?

Sales person: Do you have a licence?

Customer: No not yet...and do you sell those heat sensing scopes?

Man you should of seen this bloke. My son and I just looked at each other and smiled. I wonder how many guys like that the staff see everyday.


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A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache!"
 
Posts: 8102 | Location: Bloody Queensland where every thing is 20 years behind the rest of Australia! | Registered: 25 January 2001Reply With Quote
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Picture of sambarman338
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It's not always the customers who are bonkers, either.

There used to be a gun dealer in his dotage near us. One day a woman wearing a Middle-Eastern head covering came to collect a rifle for her husband who was too busy to drop in.

Without requiring her to sign anything, he just handed her the gun, which she took by the heel, like Thetis about to dip Achilles in the Styx, and headed for the door.

I got there first and barred the way, telling the dealer he could not let her walk out into the street like that. So he wrapped the rifle in brown paper, round and round so it still looked like a gun, and off she went.
 
Posts: 5188 | Location: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: 31 March 2009Reply With Quote
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My favourite, overheard at the Bendigo Wild Deer expo....

Guru to his obviously newbie mate - "See that mate? (Points at rifle). "That's a PICANINNY rail, that means you can mount military scopes..."


"You won't shoot anything at home on the couch...."
 
Posts: 92 | Location: South Australia | Registered: 24 October 2010Reply With Quote
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I was at a friend's gun shop in Houston, Texas many years ago.

They had a 100 yards shooting range at the back, where people can practice.

I had a custom made rifle by Shilen, in 220 Rocket.

It was extremely accurate.

Three chaps appeared, with a brand new Remington rifle in 8mm Remington Magnum.

They proceeded to shoot - never hitting the target at all!.

I asked them what they were going to shoot with it.

"We are going deer hunting. And we want our deer to drop dead, instead of running wounded into the next county"

As we were talking, Dean, the man running the range, said "Saeed, there a small spider on your target, can you hit it?"

I looked through the scope, and sure enough, there was a small spider, no bigger than a quarter.

I said "Sure, watch it"

He turned to the other three and said "Watch that spider with your spotting scope"

BANG.

A hole appeared where the spider was.

He said to them.

"If you don't want to chase your deer into the next county, learn to shoot first"


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Posts: 69652 | Location: Dubai, UAE | Registered: 08 January 1998Reply With Quote
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I used to work in a gun shop part time. As well as volunteer as a range officer twice a week and after a while you start to hate the sport because of the fools you have to deal with.
 
Posts: 110 | Location: sydney australia | Registered: 22 May 2005Reply With Quote
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Picture of Bren7X64
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quote:
Originally posted by hornet nick:
I used to work in a gun shop part time. As well as volunteer as a range officer twice a week and after a while you start to hate the sport because of the fools you have to deal with.



+1

I was doing an RO course a few years ago and the guy giving the course was giving us the benefit of his wisdom, where he told us that the old Spanish pistols (Astra, Star, Llama) were purposely made badly, because they were only meant to be fired 4 to 5 times in their life and then dropped.

Reason being they were designed for hit-men who'd shoot someone and get rid of the gun. Idiot!!!


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Promise me, when I die, don't let my wife sell my guns for what I told I her I paid for them.
 
Posts: 1048 | Location: Canberra, Australia | Registered: 03 August 2012Reply With Quote
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Picture of buffybr
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Years ago I was doing some Christmas shopping at a Denver, Colorado department store that had a sporting goods section that sold guns.

While I was there I saw another customer point at a Model 94 Winchester and he asked the salesman "Is that rifle semi- or full automatic?"

The salesman replied "I don't know, I'll have to ask my boss."


NRA Endowment Life Member
 
Posts: 1642 | Location: Boz Angeles, MT | Registered: 14 February 2006Reply With Quote
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It would be about twenty years ago i had a k98 to sell on consignment at a Brisbane Gunshop i decided to keep it, so went back to pick it up, the Gunshop owner was an Englishman and one of those hypo types and a smart arse .
I told him,'' ive come to pick up that k98 '' ,he replies obnoxiously ''Well Tough Titties its been sold ''!!! at this time some school boys were walking past the front of the shop and one jumped up and tapped the swinging Gunshop sign and the other lifts the wheelie bin lid and drops it, and keep walking .
The Gunshop owner then screams out at the top of his voice ''You Bastards '' !!!! and runs into the back of his shop and comes out with a loaded cocked revolver, and runs off out of the shop after them ,im thinking ,''im going to be on the news tonight '',He later returns [without any shots fired ]gives me my money and i gladly exit the place never to return !!!! needless to say the Gunshop closed not long after ,maybe after he was committed to an asylum .
 
Posts: 625 | Location: Australia | Registered: 07 April 2006Reply With Quote
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Picture of Labman
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A few years ago I was in a sporting goods store that also sold some guns and ammo. I was standing by the gun counter when a guy walked in and asked the clerk for a box of "40 ammo". The clerk hands him a box of 40 S&W and as the customer is paying for his ammo he states "these are the same as 9 mm's, right". The clerk just shrugged his shoulders and said "I don't know." I informed them both of their error.


Tom Z

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Posts: 2347 | Location: Pennsylvania | Registered: 07 January 2005Reply With Quote
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Picture of BaxterB
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quote:
I used to work in a gun shop part time. As well as volunteer as a range officer twice a week and after a while you start to hate the sport because of the fools you have to deal with.



Too damn true. Been there, done that. If I had a dollar for every time a guy bought a rifle/scope combo on the way to camp, I could buy most of you dinner.
 
Posts: 7832 | Registered: 31 January 2005Reply With Quote
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Buffybr, That's probably the same store I knew of years back when I was in gunsmithing school.
They had been looking for someone to work in their gun department." Must have sales experience"
I watched the 'salesman' a while then walked away shaking my head.. Perhaps he had sales experience but he certainly didn't know much about guns ! faint
 
Posts: 7636 | Registered: 10 October 2002Reply With Quote
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