Driving down a residential street with the usual cars parted on both sides and a narrow pathway between them, I had to stop because a cat was in the road. He didn't move out of the way so I honked my horn. I couldn't just run over him with the high probability of witnesses in the neighborhood. Cat still wouldn't move. Just layed there in the sun. Honked some more and a guy came out of the nearby house. He saw the situation and yelled back at his wife and told her that her cat was in the street again. She yelled back to "Tell him to run over the stupid thing". Momentarily I had a vision of a flat cat but dismissed that quickly, it would never happen. The guy looked at me and said "The cat does this all the time, go ahead and run over it if you want". I had never had an invitation for fun given to me on a silver platter before. My right foot started quivering in anticipation. I said "Your kidding aren't you?. He said "Hell no, run over the POS if you want". An impulse hit me that turned off all civilized logic. My right foot quickly went from the brake pedal to smashing the accelerator. The multiport fuel injected 454 responded like it had never before and all I could hear were the 12.50x16 snow tires squealing and could smell the burnt rubber. The truck launched itself like a dragster and I heard two quick thump thumps as the cat got shredded by the spinning radials. On an adrenaline high I looked back and saw the guy grinning in surprise and giving me a thumbs up rather than the expected index finger. This restored my faith in mankind. There are sensible people out there. Maybe I'll install Nitrous Oxide on the 454 for the next time a cat won't move.

It would have only taken me 1 time to be invited to flaten a cat.
LOL

Johnch

That story should be in Reader's Digest to help the rest of the country back to reality. BTW, do you believe the tires should be spinning at impact or locked up? I'm for locked up myself. N.S.

Fantastic, will you compile a book someday? Something like: Thoughts on a Lifetime of Pussy Pounding"

N.S. Sherlock, I vote for spinning. Me and a buddy once found a freshly flattened bunny on a back road and experimented with spinning tires. I'd help him stop the wheel just short of the carcass and he'd pop the clutch at about 4,000 RPM. Little bunny went flying every time, getting steadily more messy. That was with an '85 Civic.

I'd say with a 454 you could really skin the little bastards. Besides, if you're trying with wheels locked you might give them a chance to escape impact.

I'm not unreasonable, however, so please explain your choice. There may well be factors of which I'm ignorant.

Ned,,I vote for application of pressure to gas peadal,,When in doubt,,gass it out I vented on a delivery dude one time,,he came a few times to pick up plants,,and pokeyed his way into getting stuck every time it was the least bit wet I had my fill of his antics,,and told him to hop in my ford ranger 2 w/d extended cab,he got in and I hit the gas preaching about if in doubt gas it out,,,all the while going over hill and dale and through the valleys with about 2" mud,,,, while I was ranting,,son of a bitch,,,if you're moving,,,don't stop!!!!!We're friends now,,And trade rounds at the bar,,Clay

I chose spinning because I didn't have a spotter other than the cat's owner. Spinning Buckshot Mudders do a nice job of cat redistribution. I did not stop and clean the pieces off his neighbors cars. I did find a few chucks still in my wheel wells when I got home but the neigbors Rottweiler cleaned them off. Better than dog biscuits I reasoned. The rottweiller stood around with his tail wagging looking at me with a "got any more chunkies" look for awhile. My cat loving neighbor asked if I had hit a deer and I said "No, it was a calico I think". He gave me a weird look. I haven't yet told him outright what my attitude is about cats.

OEH you must be doing something right.

Flattening cats with all 4-wheels locked up is like sliding into home! It doesn't get any better. But, I do know that sometimes the tires have to smoke when the light turns green!

Not that I've kept this a secret but I prefer the application of a mature 4-wheel drift. It provides the delicate balance of transverse shear and high thrust on the longitudinal axis. The front wheels roll 'em up, the back ones spit 'em out. Don't get any better than that!

Dan

Pres., TYHC

www.Stirling.Moss

OEK,

the nitrous may give the truck to much lift and keep you from getting a good mash. you may want to look at running studded tires year round.

OEH

the nitrous may give the truck to much lift and keep you from getting a good mash. you may want to put studs in your tires look at running them year round. you may also want to install cat flaps (aka: mud flaps) to keep cat off your paint.

Cat Doc, don't recall seeing you around these parts before. Welcome aboard! Rest assured that what you don't show us, we'll show you.

What part of Missouri?

Dan

Pres., TYHC

www.WeShow.MissouriCratsToo

DD,

I have been reading the post here for a while. I wanted to make sure I wasn't too sick for you people before I started posting anything.

southwest corner

quote:

A cat in a live trap will swim like hell for about a minute.

Well, down here they don't do so well. The water's warmer and our live traps are self propelled. Makes clean up a snap. Pardon the pun.

Dan

Pres., TYHC

www.Go.Gators!

Cat Doctor,

The only question is if you are sick enough. With the name cat doctor we didn't know if you were a cat lover. If you are not a cat lover then should we call you Doctor Death as far as cats are concerned? Tell us of some of your exploits!

although I'm not a Doctor I play one in the field I'm happy to perscribe 17 grains of v-max for all cats I prefer to use a savage 17hmr with a bas-x trigger for injection. On a calm day I can hold a 1" group at 200 yds and the v-max provides a lot of devistation. which is always fun. sometimes you can even get some arobics out of em.

DD,

If you have ever had a cat in a live trap(if not sardines work well for bait) you know they are usually pretty pissed off and to get them out of the trap can be pretty tricky. the first thing you need to do is calm the cat down. the best way I have found is to put the trap in a pond for a minute or give them a little cb pill.

Cat Doc
DD's "Live Traps" are alive and swimming in the waterway behind his house. Ask him nicely and he'll show you photo's of Big Al and Little Bob.

I hope he has a hell of a pooper scooper!!!!!!

I could come up with all kinds of fun with that setup.

you could use one of those dog tie up steaks with the swivel a piece of 20' rope and a collar small enough for a crat and a cooler full of your favorite cold beverage and have a great time. It wouldn't exactly be like going to the dog races but the same concept.....

CD, fear not and be welcome here. Have no doubt that sanity IS whacking a feral, or a domestic if need be, much more than accepting paw prints on the kitchen counter top right out of the litter box, a bathroom or utility room that smells like the back stairs in a flop house, playing kissy-face with kitty-boo just after a grooming session, or picking out the cat crap in the sandbox. N.S.

Cat Doc, say "Hello" to Big Al. A certified self propelled live trap snapper.

Is that cool, or what?

Dan,

Do you ever give Big Al or Little Bob, any extra exercise? Like throwing a live crat into the creek, you know the swim or die routine.(for the crat). You could be putting a little excitment into the boys day.

Hog Killer

OEH here is one you might try out. Last weekend I was up north helping a friend of mine work on his big yellow cat and as I was backing it out of the shop his wife was yelling to stop but it was too late, the D-8 took out two of her prize winning cats in nothing flat.

quote:

the D-8 took out two of her prize winning cats in nothing flat.

That reminds me of the time I put a penny on the rail tracks in Ft. Worth. Real flat.

HK, they don't need my help with that. My warm and sincere friendship with Al began a couple of years back as I recall. He nailed one of the neighbors crats while it was stalking a bird on the shoreline. BTW, it is a terrific way to start the day, inspiring to say the least. Damn near blew half my coffee out my nose when he made the strike! They still don't know what happened, and I'll never tell.

Dan

Pres., TYHC

www.Chomp.Chomp

quote:

He nailed one of the neighbors crats while it was stalking a bird on the shoreline

Damn I'd like to see some video of that!

www.food.chain

DD,

al could problably take care of some troublesome neighborhood kids too. If it wasn't to cold for them here I'd like to have an al too. maybe I could build him something like a dog house to stay in. I don't think my subdivision has anything agains gators.