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One of Us |
Was across the street talking to my neighbor who rolled the cat flat last week. We were standing in his garage talking about building winch mounts when he dropped his beer and grabbed a broom and started chasing something. He came back and salvaged what was left of his beer and muttered something about a persistent tom cat. It seems that one old tom kept coming over and sniffing the area where the cat was crushed on his driveway. He would then start marking everything he could. Weird behavior that was stinking up my neighbors garage. I gave him a few suggestions from you guys on what to do to get rid of the tom cat. He was just about through with his beer when he saw the tom sneaking into his garage on the side where his garden tools are kept. I grabbed his beer when he reached for the broom. For a few minutes it was chaos as my neighbor tried to shoo the cat out. The old tom was determined to stay in the garage. The tom darted under my neighbor's electric lawn mower's deck and refused to come out, snarling all the while. My neighbor was pissed and looked at me and asked "What do I do with this damn cat?". I looked around and saw a roll of duct tape on his workbench. I peeled off a couple feet of tape and wrapped it around the lawn mower handle and the safety bail thus overriding the safety switch. I then set the mower control to "ON" which did nothing since it wasn't plugged in. My neighbor quickly caught on and threw me the end of a long extension cord which I plugged into the mower before I moved over near him and the electrical outlet. With a malicious and Satanic grin my neighbor plugged the extension cord into the wall outlet while he muttered something like "F*&% cat, meet your maker!". What happened next had to be seen to be believed. It was like a garage version of a blender with a howl from the cat and then chunks and goo blowing out the discharge chute of the mower. The smell was incredible. I can no longer watch the TV ads for food processors without grinning. RELOAD - ITS FUN! | ||
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One of Us |
Dude now thats what I'm screaming,,,,,,, should have got that on video... Dwindling the worlds lead supply one cat at a time!! | |||
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one of us |
Now that's just too cool!!!!!!!!!!!Kill'em All!!!!!!!! Clay | |||
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one of us |
It's a BEAUTIFUL day in the Neighborhood! "Make yourselves sheep and the wolves will eat you" G. ned ludd | |||
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One of Us |
O E H, I just love reading your stories!! They have incredible substance and always a happy ending! Smedley ______________________ Smedley ______________________ From Audacity of Hope: 'I will stand with the Muslims should the political winds shift in an ugly direction.' B.H.Obullshitter ------------------------------------ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery" Winston Churchill ------------------------------------ "..it does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority keen to set brush fires in people's minds.." Samuel Adams ------------------------------------ Facts are immaterial to liberals. Twisted perceptions however are invaluable. ------------------------------------ We Americans were tired of being thought of as dumb, by the rest of the world. So we went to the polls in November 2008 and removed all doubt.....let's not do it again in 2012 please. | |||
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One of Us |
Well worth the bother of cleaning up..... ****************** "Policies making areas "gun free" provide a sense of safety to those who engage in magical thinking..." Glenn Harlan Reynolds | |||
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