Ladies and Gentlemen,

As some of you already know, we are off to Tanzania tomorrow morning, for a 21 day hunt with our friends the Vincents.

It was Nelson's birthday yesterday, so Walter prepared a dinner BBQ for all of us at his house.

And as I had Walter's air ticket, I thought of giving it to him.

I did that as soon as I arrived.

We all had a great dinner, after which I went home.

Just before 1 in the morning, my phone rings. And from the caller ID I could see it was Walter Jr. Walter's son.

He said "My father is in a panic! He is sweating, red in the face and swearing at you! He seems to have lost all his marbles! And he says it is all your fault!"

I said "Slow down! What is his problem?"

Walter JR "He cannot find his air ticket. And he thinks you have something to do with it!"

Me "I gave him the ticket, and told him to go put it with his passport before he looses it. He said he could not do that. I asked him why. He said because he does not know where his passport was! There you have your answer. He must have put his ticket together with his passport. And as he does not know where the passport is, the ticket is lost too! Now, can I go back to sleep?"

I called Walter this morning.

Me "Have you found your ticket?"
Walter "NO! But I found my passport"

Me "Why didn't you put the ticket with the passport yesterday as I asked you?"
Walter "Because I did not KNOW where my passport was yesterday! So I put the ticket somewhere else so it won't get lost too! Anyway, why did you bring it here? Why didn't you keep it and give it to me at the airport?"

Me "Because you asked me to bring it to you"

Walter "You should know by now that you should not listen to me when I say things like that"

Me "Don't forget the computer and the sattelite modem"

Walter "I gave those to Nelson. He does not forget things. He has not known you as long as I have. You have not had enough time to make him a nervous wreck like me"

Me "Don't forget you are having dinner here tonight. And I will pick you up in the morning on the way to the airport. Just to make sure you make it on time."

Walter "Do that! I have plans for you and Roy. I am going to make your lives miserable the moment we arrive in camp!"

What does one do with someone like Walter?

Q: "What does one do with someone like Walter?"

A: Laugh and try not to cry or get angry.

Bon voyage.

Whack 'em and stack 'em.

Saeed: Good luck on your hunt tomorrow and we all look forward to your reports from the field. As to Walter, there's a movie with Peter Sellers called "The Wrong Box." Walter sounds just like the character Peter Sellers played, a very scatter-brained absent minded professor! Just be careful in camp, he might sneak into yur tent and put your hand in a bucket of warm water while you sleep! Have fun. jorge

quote:

What does one do with someone like Walter?

Crab bait where I'm from! OR in your case Leopard bait..........

Better Yet he could run for Political office in the State of California (probably win too!)

Saaed,

Have you ever considered a baby sitting service for Walter ?
Good luck

I called Walter this morning, he still has not found his ticket.

I told him to call the lady at the travel agent's who does our travels to get him a new ticket issued.

I then called the same lady, and told her the story. She will arrange for a new ticket to be issued. But, will not answer Walters call when he rings.

She has caller ID , and knows both his home and cell phone number.

She was laughing, and said "Oh this is going to be fun!"

Walter does bring the best out of people.

Good one ?

Tell him that since you are gone for quite a while he drive himself down !

quote:

What does one do with someone like Walter?

Well, it depend only, IMHVO, by the country where you are. You can invoke the self-defense right after you have killed him, probably you should be considered a hero

You can also leave without him, you can kill him when you get back, but it is less easy to invoke the self defense right.

Or you can pry Allah, may His Name be blessed, to give to infinite patience for the rest of your life, may it be longer than Walter one.

Italian motto "tegni` o massai" that can be translated in "keep it/them or kill it/them"

Best wishes for your trip.

Best of luck to you on this adventure. Hope Walter is able to make the trip.

I wish I could be present to see Walter looking for his ticket...Or listening while he is trying to call the travel agent....

Saeed have a great hunt...


Mike

Saeed: may the gods of the chase give you a buff with horns of 52 inches...and to us the pictures

Good times and good hunting.

It will all be for nothing if he doesn't have enough pages in his passport. I'm surprised this issue hasn't happened yet with him.

Do not be harrassing Walter at this time. He has a lot of things to coordinate before a safari.

Get him a secretary. His time is too important to be dealing with the locations of tickets and passports.

He'll forget which end of the elephant is the business end !!

Enjoy your hunting trip and try to relax, sounds like it might be a challenge with Walter!

What a start!

Will you be able to refrain from shooting him or feeding him alive to the crocs?

Walter had dinner here last night. As soon as he finished eating his desert, he said he had to leave.

He said he had to do some last minute shopping!!?

So he left with the promise of me picking him up at 7 in the morning.

Me "You better be packed and ready by seven. I am not going to wait for you if you are not"

Walter "Don't worry. I will be ready. I am not going to give you an excuse to leave me behind!"

Just before 3 the phone rings!?

I looked at the caller ID, and guess what?

Yep! It is HIM!

Me "What do want now?"

Walter "I have finished packing. And I am ready to go. I cannot sleep. I am worried you will do something to leave me behind. So to make sure you DON'T, I thought better I wake you up and remind you that I am ready!"

Me "You know what time it is? Why don't you wake up your wife and say your final goodbye to her! Because you are really pushing your luck in becoming hyaena bait"

Walter, laughing now "My wife is upset! She finally can tell how happy I am to go hunting! Much more than when I go shopping with her! Ha ha ha! She does not appreciate it that I have sooo much fun with YOU and Roy than with her!"

Me "Then wake Nelson up and bother HIM. I want to go back to sleep"

Nelson is staying at Walter's house. He arrived from Chile 4 days ago.

Walter "Nelson is my FRIEND! He is snoring so loudly he make Ray's snoring like a whisper! I have to think of something to stop him from sleeping in Africa! I have etching powder. And I will put it in his bed."

Me "Typical! Can't you think of something NICE to do to your friends for a change! No wonder you are always at the receiving end of everybody's nasty tricks!"

Walter "This year I have decided to pay everyone BACK! Especially you and Roy! No matter what you two do, I will do worst things to you"

Me "See you at 7"

Thanks to our genius, now I cannot go back to sleep!

Ahh...it might be Walter's fault that you woke up but you are excited to go hunting! After all of those days in Africa you still can't sleep the night before you leave. Nothing wrong with that.

Thank the Lord Walter does not have his PPL and is designated as the Pilot to fly the charter plane from Dar to the bush airstrip, can you imagine the faces of the passengers if Walter were to take the controls (-:

Cheers, Peter

Saeed the whole problem is that you gave Walter your phone numbers. Just think how much quieter your life would be if he didn't know them.

Saeed, Good luck on your hunt as well as your "babysitting" Walter. Keep us posted on all the goings on.

This is going to be one heck of an adventure!

Hope Walter remembered to pack the roller blades.