So the past two years have been the worst of my 59yrs on this earth..

In Sept 2019 my wife, son and I spent two weeks in Africa hunting and had a wonderful time. My son and I both took buffalo and my wife got to visit all her friends - Africa was her favorite place. In Dec 2019 I returned from Romania and Turkey having taken a Carpathian Chamois and a great Bezoar Ibex - another wonderful trip.

Life was good...

Here comes 2020.. In March Covid shuts down the world and sends us all running to our bomb shelters expecting the world to implode. By June we had our fill of the covid bullshit and we were ready to jump in our motorhome and go places just to get away.

Then the worst news in my life hit - my wonderful wife of 36 years was diagnosed with Stage IV cancer that had spread thru her liver and lungs. Next came 4 months of brutal chemo in an attempt to slow the progression and give us more time. On October 27th, 2020 God decided he had other plans for her and now she waits for me on the other side.

Between all this Covid bullshit and losing her I just buried myself in my work for all of 2021. I finally went on a short fishing trip with some guys to Andros over Thanksgiving but was (and still am) struggling with the future - where do I go from here? Your entire world changes when you lose someone than has been your entire life for almost 37 years.

It is just me now... an incredibly weird feeling! I mean I have my son, daughter and grandsons around me but its not the same..

Yesterday I decided it is time to get my life back on track and I started by booking a ticket to Vegas for the SCI convention. Like many of you - Convention rejuvenates and fires my desire to plan hunting trips. It has always been my annual motivator..

My wife and I never missed convention - she loved going every year. Maybe she is reaching down and wacking me on the head saying "why aren't you going stupid?" ....

Well I got the message - I am going, I am going to start planning and booking hunting trips and figure out where my life goes from here!

Scott,
I'm very sorry for the loss of your wife but elated at your decision to get back out and again enjoy the activities you both loved to do together. Everything you described are normal parts of the grieving and healing process.

Scott,

I can only imagine your sense of lose. Having been with Sadie for 41 years I don't know how I would handle her passing. Glad to see you are starting to anticipate the future with some bright spots.

Mark

Most sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved wife. You are taking the right step and moving on after grieving.

I wish I could get my mother to do what you are doing. She has laid on her couch for 9 years since her husband passed and now she is turning 80 and so much life has passed her by.

Scott,

I don’t know you, and vice versa. But your post touched me deeply. I am SO sorry for your loss. It is obvious to anyone who read it, how much you love and miss her. She must have been quite a woman.

It made me reflect on how hard it would be on me to lose my wife. I am 70, and I can’t imagine my life without her.

Here is the good news. You WILL be with her again when you cross over. God loves us and wants us to be happy. He is taking great care of her awaiting your arrival. But He and she want you to be happy too until you meet again. So go hunting and fishing and do the things that make you happy until that day. That, will make her happy as well, because she loves you and wants you to be happy until she holds you in her arms once again.

God bless you Scott, and your wife.


surefire7

I agree with surefire7, and my sincerest condolences on your loss. I have been married to my wife for 47 1/2 years and I am 70. Even though we have 5 grown children and 12 grandchildren, it still would be hard to be alone. I have often thought about it and believe that my wife would want me to continue to love and enjoy our children, their spouses and our grandchildren, and to keep moving forward. I also think that losing yourself in serving others and participating in positive activities that you and/or your family enjoy would be therapeutic and beneficial. Moreover, at some point in time, and if and when it is right, finding another to share in your happiness going forward might bring you some peace and happiness. As the Lord said in Genesis 2:18: 'It is not good for man to be alone. I will make an helpmeet for him.' No one can take the place of your beloved spouse, but eventually finding another to share the rest of your remaining life with would be what my wife would actually want me to do. Just some of my humble suggestions.

Very very sorry to hear this.

But, life must go on.

As we get older, we will see more of our loved ones pass away.

But we must carry on, for our own sake, and for the sake of those still with us.

This is our attitude here.

And I wish you all the best.

Scott Powell;

This is life. Welcome Back. I hope you can Live your life in a way that would make your wife smile, laugh, and curse in that order.

We never want to not feel, not remember. I pray joyful memories bring smiles quickly to times tears need to come.

Scott,
Your words make me think how I would hate to lose my wife. It would break me, I know. I simply love her. I hope the memory and love you had, and have, for your beloved empowers you to carry on living as full a life as you can. I'm sure she would wish this for you. Good luck sir.

Scott- I am so sorry for your loss. I cant imagine losing ones wife but I guess it happens and in time like you are doing you do need to move on as hard as that is. I hope that 2022 will be an awesome year for you!

Do what she would want you to do! She would want you to live and live well.

You are in a hard place, Scott. I cannot imagine your pain.

I love your attitude and wish you the best going forward.

There is nothing in this world but family.

Best wishes,

Scott, I went through same thing and took me whole year to get back on my feet but as others said on here, life goes on and you’ll do
Sorry for your loss but having kids will carry you through just about anything

So sorry for your loss. I admire your spirit.

Scott, wish you the best and hang in there. She would not have wanted you to give up any more than you would have wished her to give up if the situation was reversed. As hard as it is, you honor her memory by living your life.

Very sorry to hear of your loss.

Scott,
I am sorry for your loss…may God rest her soul.

God has a plan and that plan obviously involves you moving on with life on earth. I think you are on the right track. Time here is short…live the rest of it in a meaningful way. Your wife would want that and when you see her on the other side…the separation will seem like the blink of an eye.

Have a Blessed day!

Sorry for your loss Scott. A change of scene always helps one. I was just on safari with a client and friend who lost his wife of 45 years, he was sad and depressed at times but I think it really helped him to get out and do things he loved to do.

Arjun Reddy
Hunters Networks LLC
30 Ivy Hill Road
Brewster, NY 10509
Tel: +1 845 259 3628

SCI Booth 1751 (Las Vegas 19th to 22nd January, 2022)
Western Hunting and Conservation Expo Booth 444 (Utah 10th to 13th February)

That has got to be so hard. So sorry for your loss. But going on with your life is a step in the right direction. Good Luck

I'm very sorry to hear of your loss Scott. Loosing a loved one is the most difficult thing we experience. I can't imagine your pain. I think you are correct that she would want you to get back into the game of life. Hang in there.

I want to thank you all for your kind words and encouragement, it has been a difficult road for sure... My faith has been central to dealing with the loss, the pain, and most importantly being strong for my children.

I think what hit me the hardest was when the reality of the "aloneness" set in.. Naturally we had always planned our retirement being together - snowbirding in Florida, spending time at Tucson Trap club shooting with our friends..

Everything changed in an instant - it's just me now... My 30yr old son lives with me (its a big house and he likes to cook!) but he has his own life as does my daughter and her husband and children so it is just "me" now..

For nearly 40 years I supported and protected my family, my daily routine often dictated by their needs. Now I wake up and look around trying to figure out what I should do today..

A course change of this magnitude is harder than I would have ever imagined but I am taking the first steps towards the future...


- Getting myself a personal trainer to get back in shape (this is huge I think)
- Joining a new sportsman's club
- Going to SCI convention
- Talking to outfitters

Once again - thank you all...

Scott

Scott,

You've got this. That's a great plan. Take care of yourself, make some new friends, and don't forget about your old friends. I'll keep you in my prayers and don't hesitate to send me a PM.

We are all routing for you Scott and look forward to hearing of your progress in life.