Reminds one of "The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber" does it not?

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Originally posted by shakari:

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Originally posted by butchloc:
humor makes the hunting go around. feel sorry for those that have to take everything seriously. they've probably never even brought squirt guns or water baloons on a hunt before

Here's a couple of good ones for you if you have monkeys in camp.

1) Take a doughnut or similar, pinch a small hole in it and trickle some liquor into it until it's almost soggy. Put it on a plate and walk outside with it. Then sit for a minute or two with it beside you and then walk away from it and watch what happens. A drunken monkey is one of the funniest things you'll ever see!

2) take a rubber snake and tie a 1-2 metre piece of fishing line to it and put the rubber snake in a plastic bag. Tie a doughnut or similar to the other end of the fishing line. Take it outside, weigh the corner of the bag down with a rock and leave the doughnut in view..... Then walk away and watch what happens.

The only thing funnier than a drunken monkey is one that thinks he's being chased by a snake!

Try feeding seagulls fresh bread balls soaked in Tabasco sauce.....amusing to say the least.

I guided elk/mule deer hunters at a time and had my hat shot off by a dude whom was walking behind me while stalking a mulie buck. I had instructed him not to put one in the chamber untill I told him to. After I quit shitting razorblades I ask why he had violated my rule, his reply," I needed to be ready in case the buck jumped up".
His hunt was over right there with no refund!

My son and I hunted in RSA in 2007 with Nihan Engelbrecht of Huntersgame Safaris. We both took an animal to settle down when got there, buck fever, I guess but our practise solved that by day two.

Nihan told us two stories, the first was two guys from France that had been there three weeks before, they both brought 40 rounds of ammo and left with none. Between them they shot at 22 animals, wounded and lost 6, wounded but found 4 after long searches and cleanly killed but 3 animals between the two of them them. Nihan had to borrow an extra tracker to keep looking for all the wounded animals. HE said he felt nervous everytime they got anywhere near an animal.

The other story was how was almost killed and damaged his hearing all in one shot. A client who was using a braked 338 win mag had hunted with him for several days with mixed success, a few misses and few hits but results mixed. They stopped to have lunch and the client had his rifle sitting on the padded resty thing on the top of the truck in front of the high seats. He got down and reached up to grab the rifle by the barrel to pull in down. Nihan was standing beside him looking away as he pulled it down and the gun went off just over his shoulder. Never hit anything or thankfully anyone, but a muzzlebraked 338 about a foot from his ear did some real damage.

As our hunt went on despite a couple of misses by my son and I he went out of his way to compliment us on our preparation, shooting and gun handling practises.

I've lost 60% of the hearing in my left ear, largely due to someone letting rip with a muzzle braked Blaser in .416 about a foot from my ear. I didn't see it coming because I was using my binos at the time.

Funny, it ain't!

A lady PH friend of mine nearly got whacked some years when an AD went through the back of the hood of the jacket she was wearing.