Newlywed Countryside Loving

A young farm couple, Homer and Darlene, got married and just couldn't seem to get enough lovin'. In the morning, before Homer left the house for the fields, they made love. When Homer came back from the fields, they made love. And again at bedtime, they made love.

The problem was their nooner - it took Homer a half hour to travel home and another half hour to return to the fields and he just wasn't getting enough work done. Finally Homer asked the town doctor what to do.
"Homer," said the doctor, "just take your shotguhn out to the field with you and when you're in the mood, fire off a shot into the air. That will be Darlene's signal to come out to you. Then you won't lose any field time."


They tried Doc's advice and it worked well for a while. Homer came back to the doctor's office...
"What's wrong?" asked the Doc. "Didn't my idea work?"
"Oh, it worked real good," said Homer. "Whenever I was in the mood, I fired off a shot like you said and Darlene'd come runnin'. We'd find a secluded place, make love, and then she'd go back home again."
"Good, Homer. So what's the problem?" asked the Doc.
"I ain't seen her since huntin' season started."

That's funny!
Peter.

Then there was the Mexican couple that got married + on the wedding night he told her "Maria I have something to give you + I'm the only man who has one." The next day he comes home from work + she says that she saw the neighbor hanging his laundry naked.He has one too she said. So thinking quick he tells her that he had 2 + gave him one. The next day he comes in from work + she's in tears. He asks what's wrong + she says "Why did you have to give him the good one?"

quote:

"Why did you have to give him the good one?"

is a Rusty Warren joke from the 1950's.

A young Greek couple gets married and they make love four times a day for the first 6 months.

Finally, one night the husband says "Dear, tonight we are going to do something different."

The young bride says, "Oh no! My Mother warned me about this and you are not going to try anything funny!"

Her husband looks at her in dismay and asks, "But dear, don't you want to have children?"

Sure thing Mike,there are'nt any new jokes,but we just wait awhile then rehash them.I remember several from those "blue" records of the 50's.

Frank,reminds me of Doc Daneeka in 'Catch 22'when he spoke of his prior civilian practice + was counseling some newlyweds that could'nt conceive.The husband was a REAL man ,threw it to her at least 3 times a day.The Doc had some anatomical dolls for demonstration. The husband punched him out + called him a pervert.