The Accurate Reloading Forums
Need some clean jokes if possible

This topic can be found at:
https://forums.accuratereloading.com/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/7411043/m/871104075

15 November 2006, 20:12
dogcat
Need some clean jokes if possible
I would like to have a few good, clean jokes that I can send to my college age kids. No sex, no racism, just some funny jokes.
Thanks,
15 November 2006, 22:34
Masterifleman
Question: What is the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?

Answer: The location of the dirtbag.


"I ask, sir, what is the Militia? It is the whole people. To disarm the people is the best and most effective way to enslave them" - George Mason, co-author of the Second Amendment during the Virginia convention to ratify the Constitution
15 November 2006, 23:00
butchloc
have you tried the political forum? jumping
16 November 2006, 00:04
eyedoc
Try www.jokes.com They rate their jokes according to whether they are mild , tame , or racy and also as to how funny they are judged to be.


We seldom get to choose
But I've seen them go both ways
And I would rather go out in a blaze of glory
Than to slowly rot away!
16 November 2006, 02:27
brass thief
Why can"t you get asprin in the jungle?
parrots eat"em all!
16 November 2006, 04:49
A/C guy
What's the difference between a lawnmower and a bagpipe?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
You can tune a lawnmower.
16 November 2006, 05:07
budiceale
ok...so two blonds walk into a building.

seems like at least one of them would have seen it.


blaming guns for crime is like blaming silverware for rosie o'donnell being fat
16 November 2006, 06:05
calgarychef1
If they're college aged they might appreciate some adult content!!! sofa
16 November 2006, 10:34
JLarsson
Good, clean fun - A family humor archive


Jon Larsson - Hunter - Shooter - Reloader - Mostly in that order...Wink
18 November 2006, 08:29
Bobby Tomek
A friend sent me this one today:

The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street (pronounced Pee-Ka-Boo) is not just an athlete. She is now a nurse currently working at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.

She is not permitted to answer the hospital telephones any longer.

It caused too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say...... Picabo, I.C.U.


Bobby
Μολὼν λαβέ
The most important thing in life is not what we do but how and why we do it. - Nana Mouskouri

19 November 2006, 04:16
Swamp_Fox
With Christmas approaching...


A DOG'S RULES FOR CHRISTMAS

1. Be especially patient with your humans during this time. They may appear to be more stressed-out than usual and they will appreciate long comforting dog leans.

2. They may come home with large bags of things they call gifts. Do not assume that all the gifts are yours.

3. Be tolerant if your humans put decorations on you. They seem to get some special kind of pleasure out of seeing how you look with fake antlers.

4. They may bring a large tree into the house and set it up in a prominent place and cover it with lights and decorations. Bizarre as this may seem to you, it is an important ritual for your humans, so there are some things you need to know:

5. Your humans may occasionally invite lots of strangers to come visit during this season. These parties can be lots of fun, but they also call for some discretion on your part:

a. Not all strangers appreciate kisses and leans
b. Don't eat off the buffet table
c. Beg for goodies subtly
d. Be pleasant, even if unknowing strangers sit on your sofa
e. Don't drink out of glasses that are left within your reach


6. Likewise, your humans may take you visiting. Here your manners will also be important:

a. Observe all the rules in #4 for trees that may be in other people's houses. (4a is particularly important)
b. Respect the territory of other animals that may live in the house
c. Tolerate children
d. Turn on your charm big time


7. A big man with a white beard and a very loud laugh may emerge from your fireplace in the middle of the night. DO NOT BITE HIM!!


******************
"Policies making areas "gun free" provide a sense of safety to those who engage in magical thinking..." Glenn Harlan Reynolds