03 September 2004, 05:32
chestspringsThe Bears
A priest, a Baptist preacher and a Rabbi were very friendly and
would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One
thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They would
all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to
convert it.
Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and
has various bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the
woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him
from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and
began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled
him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop
is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Pastor Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm
and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone
oratory he claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I
went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to him from
God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took
HOLD of him and we began to rassle. We rassled down one hill, UP another
and DOWN another until we came to a crick. So I quick DUNKED him and
BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as
a lamb. We spent the rest of the week in fellowship, feasting on God's
Holy Word, and praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital
bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running
in and out of him. He was in bad shape. The rabbi looks up and says,
"You fellows don't even know what trouble is until you try to circumcise
a bear!"
04 September 2004, 06:31
Paul B"CIRCUMCISION": The unkindest cut of all.

Paul B.
06 September 2004, 00:44
muzzaI recall I couldnt walk for near on a year afterwards - 'course I was circumcised at birth , but thats not the point...
