he DEMOCRATIC CONVENTION SCHEDULE has been released.


11:15 AM
Free lunch, medical marijuana, and bus ride to the Convention.
Forms distributed for Food Stamp enrollment.

2:30 PM
Group Voter Registration for Undocumented Immigrants.

4:00 PM
Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
Sponsored by CNN

4:15 PM
Address on "Being the Real You"
Rachel Dolezal, former Head of the Seattle NAACP, and Caitlyn Jenner

4:30 PM
"How to Bank $200 Million as a Public Servant and Claim to be Broke"
Hillary Clinton

4:45 PM
“How to have a successful career without ever having a job, and still avoid paying taxes!”
A Seminar Moderated by Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson

5:00 PM
Medals of Freedom presentation to Army deserter Bo Berghdal
Baltimore Looters

5:30 PM
Invitation-only Autograph Session
Souvenir photographs of Elizabeth Warren dressed in Native American clothing

5:45 PM
Tribute to All of the 57 States
Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi

6:00 PM
General vote on praising Baltimore rioters, and on using the terminology "Alternative Shoppers" instead of "Looters"

7:30 PM
Announcement of VP Nominee - Stacy Abrams
Former Ambassador to Chris Stevens with a quick post-mortem rebuttal

8:30 PM
The White House "Semantics Committee" Meeting
General vote on re-branding "Muslim Terrorism" as "Random Acts of Islamic Over-Exuberance"

9:00 PM
“Liberal Bias in Media – How we can make it work for you”
Tutorial sponsored by CBS, NBC, ABC, CNN, the Washington Post and the New York Times with Guest Speaker, Don Lemon

9:15 PM
Tribute Film to the Brave Freedom Fighters still incarcerated at GITMO
by Michael Moore

9:45 PM
Personal Finance Seminar - "Businesses Don't Create Jobs"
Hosted by speaker Barack Obama

10:00 PM
Group Condemnation of Bitter Gun Owners.

10:30 PM
Ceremonial “We Surrender” Waving of the White Flag

11:00 PM
Short film, "Setting Up Your Own Illegal Email Server While Serving in A Cabinet Post and How to Pretend It's No Big Deal"
Hosted by Hillary Clinton

11:30 PM
Official Nomination of Kamala Harris
Bill Maher and Chris Matthews

12:00 Group apology for being white.

Tragic if it wasn't true.

Grizz

Need a how to class on living with simplicity and good vibes, in a cardboard box in the gutter California style

quote:

Originally posted by Grizzly Adams1:
Tragic if it wasn't true.

Grizz

It IS bloody true!

How do you think Sanders and Pocahontas got the idea of providing free education??

How did the ex-waitress got the idea of eliminating air travel and converting all buildings to GREEN energy??

How do you think a draft dodger manages to be the Commander in Chief of the armed forces??

probably by going to school in his own foreign country, then transferring back to America to go to college for free before reclaiming his citizenship in the nick of time to become a senator..
I'm just guessing.

And just when you thought that things couldn't get any more insane. Boy, I'm glad this is the humor column, I was starting to get scared.