Substitute teachers ....

16 July 2005, 21:56

One day Johnny's class had a new sustitute teacher, Miss Johnson.

While they were doing their math homework, Miss Johnson asked litlle Johnny a question ....

"Johnny, if there were three birds sitting on a fence, and you shot one, how many birds would be left?"

Johnny replied, "None."

"None?" Miss Johnson asked.

"Yes," replied Johnny. "If I shot one bird, the others would fly away."

"Well," said Miss Johson, with a laugh, "I was looking for two, but I like the way you think."

Later that day at lunch, Johnny approached Miss Johnson.

"Miss Johnson," Johnny said, "can I ask you a question?"

"Yes you can," she replied.

"Ma'am, do you see those three ladies sitting on the bench?"

"Yes."

"Which of those three ladies do you think is married? Is it the one reading her book, or is it the one doing her nails, or is it the one licking the ice cream cone?" Johnny asked.

Miss Johnson took a moment and replied, "Well, I think it's the lady licking the ice cream cone."

Johnny smiled and said, "Actually, it's the one wearing the wedding ring, but I like the way you think."

The mania for giving the Government power to meddle with the private affairs of cities or citizens is likely to cause endless trouble, through the rivaly of schools and creeds that are anxious to obtain official recognition, and there is great danger that our people will lose our independence of thought and action which is the cause of much of our greatness, and sink into the helplessness of the Frenchman or German who expects his government to feed him when hungry, clothe him when naked, to prescribe when his child may be born and when he may die, and, in fine, to regulate every act of humanity from the cradle to the tomb, including the manner in which he may seek future admission to paradise.
Mark Twain

"ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ " "Victory or Death!"