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Church dinner

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14 October 2018, 07:04
xgrunt
Church dinner
Church Dinner
>
> A group of friends from the Cottonwood Church wanted to get together on a regular basis, socialize, and play games. The lady of the house was to prepare the meal.
>
> When it came time for Al and Jean to be the hosts, Jean wanted to outdo all the others. She decided to have mushroom-smothered steak. But mushrooms are expensive. She then told her husband, "No mushrooms.They are too high."
>
> He said, "Why don't you go down in the pasture and pick some of those mushrooms? There are plenty in the creek bed."
>
> She said, "No, some wild mushrooms are poison."
>
> He said, "Well, I see varmints eating them and they're OK." So Jean decided to give it a try. She picked a bunch, washed, sliced, and diced them for her smothered steak.
>
> Then she went out on the back porch and gave Ol' Spot (the yard dog) a double handful. Ol' Spot ate every bite. All morning long, Jean watched Ol' Spot and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him, so she decided to use them.
>
> The meal was a great success, and Jean even hired a helper lady from town to help her serve. After everyone had finished, they relaxed, socialized, and played '42' and dominoes. About then, the helper lady came in and whispered in Jean's ear.
>
> She said, "Mrs. Williams, Ol' Spot is dead."
>
> Jean went into hysterics. After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told him what had happened.
>
> The doctor said, "That's bad, but I think we can take care of it. I will call for an ambulance and I will be there as quickly as possible. We'll give everyone enemas and we will pump out everyone's stomach. Everything will be fine. Just keep them calm."
>
> Soon they could hear the siren as the ambulance was coming down the road.
>
> The EMTs and the doctor had their suitcases, syringes, and a stomach pump.
>
> One by one, they took each person into the bathroom, gave them an enema, and pumped out their stomach. The scene was not pretty. After the last one was finished, the doctor came out and said, "I think everything will be fine now," and he left. They were all looking pretty weak sitting around the living room and about this time the helper lady came in and whispered to Jean,
>
> "You know, that fellow that run over Ol' Spot never even stopped."
>
14 October 2018, 09:05
Moremonte
rotflmo jumping Ol Spot Never Had a Chance!!
14 October 2018, 09:11
Use Enough Gun
Big Grin
15 October 2018, 03:53
Grizzly Adams
Message being, be sure to get the whole story before making a decision. Wink

Grizz


Indeed, no human being has yet lived under conditions which, considering the prevailing climates of the past, can be regarded as normal. John E Pfeiffer, The Emergence of Man

Those who can't skin, can hold a leg. Abraham Lincoln

Only one war at a time. Abe Again.
15 October 2018, 04:18
Peter
On the positive side, that IS a dinner that EVERYONE will remember!
Peter.


Be without fear in the face of your enemies. Be brave and upright, that God may love thee. Speak the truth always, even if it leads to your death. Safeguard the helpless and do no wrong;
15 October 2018, 09:18
NormanConquest
Oh very YES,she will be offered the job of hostess again!


Never mistake motion for action.
18 October 2018, 04:34
Ole Miss Guy
" The scene was not pretty."
That was enough description.