15 November 2005, 17:35
dogcatA little levity needed for the Africa Hunting thread
Please indulge me as we all need a little levity at times-
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:
What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than
100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
And,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that WhileHard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude willget you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top
15 November 2005, 18:11
geekayObviously compiled by a junior military officer with far too much time on his hands or; alternativly, a university graduate employed in the public service.
15 November 2005, 19:01
tnekkccDogcat,
28 years ago, another young engineer turned white as a ghost when he saw me get a bigger raise than him. He was certain that he was a better engineer, but he didn't realize I had put 103% to 118% into communicating with management.
He is now an engineering supervisor at a small avionics company and I am a millionare.
15 November 2005, 19:50
Ben589And for women (or guys too depending on circumstances these days), what does:
S-L-E-E-P-I-N-G-W-I-T-H-Y-O-U-R-B-O-S-S get you?
19+12+5+5+16+9+14+7+23+9+20+8+25+15+21+18+2+15+19+19 = 281%
I think we have a clear winner.
16 November 2005, 01:06
dogcatquote:
Originally posted by tnekkcc:
Dogcat,
28 years ago, another young engineer turned white as a ghost when he saw me get a bigger raise than him. He was certain that he was a better engineer, but he didn't realize I had put 103% to 118% into communicating with management.
You seem to be a good math student. Way to go.
He is now an engineering supervisor at a small avionics company and I am a millionare.