Perks of reaching 50.



01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.



02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.



03. No one expects you to run-- anywhere.



04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?



05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.



06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.



07. Things you buy now won't wear out.



08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.



09. You can live without sex but not your glasses.



10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.



11 You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.



12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.



13. You sing along with elevator music.



14. Your eyes won't get much worse.



15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.



16. Your joints (headaches) are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.


17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.



18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.





One last tip.

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

quote:

13. You sing along with elevator music.

Can you imagine what elevator music will sound like 40 years from now!!!
RAP music(?).................OMG!
That's why God doesn't let us live forever!

quote:

Originally posted by reloaderman:

quote:

13. You sing along with elevator music.

Can you imagine what elevator music will sound like 40 years from now!!!
RAP music(?).................OMG!
That's why God doesn't let us live forever!

You mean "why God doesn't force us to live forever", I suspect.......she is too nice an old gal to do that, even if she does have her quirks.

Just imagine, in 40 years, folks will be on moving sidealks every time they go TO an elevator. They will not only be too lazy to walk upstairs, they'll be too lazy to walk to the elevator! Getting there without ANY effort will be an entitlement!!