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How Various Religions Solve A Squirrel Problem

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25 December 2019, 06:09
Kensco
How Various Religions Solve A Squirrel Problem
The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation. After much prayer and consideration, they concluded the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn't interfere with God's divine will.

At the Baptist church the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and unfortunately, instinctively knew how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.

The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God's creatures. So they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water-slide.

The Catholic church came up with a very creative strategy! They baptized all the squirrels and consecrated them as members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue; they took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven't seen another squirrel since.
25 December 2019, 07:39
Moremonte
rotflmo tu2Bet None Of Them Ever Had a "Mississippi Squirrel".
25 December 2019, 08:19
NormanConquest
Speaking of which, that would be funny to see again. Somebody pull up Ray Stevens + we'll all get a hoot.


Never mistake motion for action.
25 December 2019, 08:28
Use Enough Gun
rotflmo jumping
25 December 2019, 21:44
muzza
quote:
Mississippi Squirrel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K16fG1sDagU


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