26 February 2016, 01:15
vashperManeuver two
A mountain lad was very late for school one morning, but his excuse was deemed adequate. "Maw woke up Paw at three in the morning," he explained, "because she heard a noise in the hen house. Paw grabbed his shotgun and ran outside. He pointed it at the hen house and waited for something to happen. Something happened, all right. Our old hound dog came up behind Paw with his cold nose, and we've been cleaning chickens ever since."
26 February 2016, 01:51
A/C guyAs Paul Harvey would say, "the rest of the story"
Late again," the third-grade teacher said to little Johnny.
"It ain't my fault," Miss Crabtree. "You can blame this on my Daddy. The reason I'm three hours late is Daddy sleeps naked!"
Now Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for thirty-some-odd years. So she asked little Johnny what he meant by that, despite her mounting fears.
Full of grins and mischief, and in the flower of his youth, little Johnny and trouble were old friends, but he always told the truth.
"You see, Miss Crabtree, at the ranch we got this here lowdown coyote. The last Few nights he done et six hens and killed Ma's best milk goat. And last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his gun and said to Ma, "That coyote's back again, I'm a gonna git him!'"
'Stay back, he yelled to all us kids!"
He was naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt! To the hen house he crawled, just like an Injun on the snoop. Then he stuck that double barrel through the window of the
coop. As he stared into the darkness, with coyotes on his mind, our old hound dog Zeke had done woke up and come asneakin' up behind Daddy.
Then we all looked on plumb helpless as old Zeke stuck that cold nose in Daddy's crack!
"Miss Crabtree, we been pluck'n an cleanin' chickens since three o'clock this mornin'!"
Brutuskend is offline
26 February 2016, 06:22
Use Enough Gun
Either way, they're both funny!

26 February 2016, 20:23
ZekeShikarHey! Why does the dog need to be named ZEKE? LMAO
Zeke