We have this same site somewhere here but I couldn't find it so here goes. When King Phillip 11 of Macedon (father of Alexander)besieged the city of Sparta, he threatenden them thus If I defeat you, we will raze your city in the ground. We will kill every m,an + boy in the city + take every woman + girl as slaves. The Spartan's sent only one word in reply. "IF". This is thought to be the original laconic reply.

Got to be one of the best replies ever!

Yeah, I like it even better than "Nuts".