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Getting even with a cat lover

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01 February 2006, 11:00
Old Elk Hunter
Getting even with a cat lover
I was finally shoveling some snow in my back yard after we had several weeks of snow and near zero
weather. I found a frozen cat in the snow near the drip line from my roof. I guess he got squashed by a lump of snow or ice that shed from my steep roof. I have a neighbor that has a cat lover for a wife and he is an archery hunter of sorts. I took the cat into my garage and applied heat from a heat gun in the cat's midsection until he was partially thawed there. I then took one of my neighbors custom arrows that had landed in my yard last fall and stuck it into the cat. That night I dropped the cat over the fence into the neighbors' yard in his wife's prize rose bushes. Next morning around 10 AM I hear this bloodchilling scream next door. The wife was puttering around in her yard and found the cat with one of her husbands custom arrows in it. That evening when he got home from work I could hear her screaming and cussing at him for killing a cat. Nothing he could say would calm her down. I don't think he got any for a month.

Don't get me wrong, I have no beef with archery hunters, but I don't like ones that publically say that rifle
hunting should be outlawed. That turns him from an archer into a stick flicking forest fairy.


RELOAD - ITS FUN!
01 February 2006, 16:17
N. S. Sherlock
Just another variety of the raving eletist clan. I saw that malady starting in jimmy carter's administration with public lands use changes to the effect if you were not 25 and able to hump a ruck into the wilderness the experience was forbidden to you. I hope you have another arrow saved for the next chance at payback.
01 February 2006, 17:36
DigitalDan
quote:
That turns him from an archer into a stick flicking forest fairy.


I've never heard that phrase before. SFFF, or in scientific notation: SF^3. I...got up off the floor, and have dried my eyes, regained my dignity, and had the missus cancel the call for an ambulance. thumb Reading your story again...she offered Prozac but I declined. OEH, remind me to NOT piss you off...if ever I should forget. Truly, you are a master of literary presentation, clap a visionary and potential candidate for the White House in '08. thumb

Sir, I stand before you, humble, and prepared to do your bidding....
jumping

Dan

POTYHC

www.TheJuniorPres.FromYankeetown




If yuro'e corseseyd and dsyelixc can you siltl raed oaky?

01 February 2006, 18:36
panzerguy
Me X 2
01 February 2006, 23:59
butchloc
i gotta reread this again - just as soon as the tears clear from my eyes & i can get up off the floor jumping clap beer Big Grin lol
02 February 2006, 01:50
gunz
I love it!! i am a hunter both gun and archery. But I almost wet myself this was so funny.


Most people are link slinkies, Basically useless but fun to push down the stairs.
02 February 2006, 02:18
claybuster
O.E.H.,,Thats just too cool!!! Clay
02 February 2006, 05:32
johnch
I am a archer , but rifle season is fun also.

Well done with the cat

Johnch


NRA life
Delta
Pheasants Forever
DU
Hunt as if your life depended on your results
02 February 2006, 06:38
Old Elk Hunter
Digtal Dan,

Thank you for your support. I wouldn't mind running in '08 if Hilary is the front runner.
I would be right behing her and a I bet the race is over before I shift out of second gear...


Do you have any Democrat-remover. I expect that it will hard to remove all that lying crap that would get entangled in my winch cable. I would have to keep the winch useable in case some Democrat needed help pulling his head out of his ass.


RELOAD - ITS FUN!
02 February 2006, 08:19
DigitalDan
Democrat remover...it falls withing reasonable job description I suppose.


Dan

POTYHC

www.OneOfA.ThousandPossibilities




If yuro'e corseseyd and dsyelixc can you siltl raed oaky?

02 February 2006, 09:23
smedley
What's that old saying? Oh ya:
I don't care who ya are, that's funny!! Yes sir, that's funny!!
animal rotflmo Big Grin lol animal lol rotflmo rotflmo clap clap thumb


Smedley


______________________

Smedley

______________________
From Audacity of Hope: 'I will stand with the Muslims should the political winds shift in an ugly direction.'
B.H.Obullshitter
------------------------------------
"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery"
Winston Churchill
------------------------------------
"..it does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority keen to set brush fires in people's minds.." Samuel Adams
------------------------------------
Facts are immaterial to liberals. Twisted perceptions however are invaluable.
------------------------------------
We Americans were tired of being thought of as dumb, by the rest of the world. So we went to the polls in November 2008 and removed all doubt.....let's not do it again in 2012 please.
02 February 2006, 21:40
panzerguy
That dripping sound you hear is me drooling over the picture of that rifle.
03 February 2006, 00:55
Old Elk Hunter
Digital Dan,

I'd swear that rifle looks more like a Yankee
remover. We could have used that to defend Richmond!


RELOAD - ITS FUN!
03 February 2006, 02:26
DigitalDan
I suspect Gen. Lee would have found use for it, somewhere on the high ground no doubt. Wink

Dan

POTYHC

www.LookitThoseBlueBellies.Scatter!




If yuro'e corseseyd and dsyelixc can you siltl raed oaky?

03 February 2006, 05:35
dustoffer
I have to doff my hat to OEH--that is a class act and I wouldn't dare try to top it. Too bad my cat-loving neighbors (4 of them) aren't archers. Come to think of it though, one is a carpenter-maybe a crat and a table saw? One is a dentist--maybe a root canal, say a .17" one?


An old pilot, not a bold pilot, aka "the pig murdering fool"
03 February 2006, 06:46
Old Elk Hunter
Dustoffer,

I would suggest a nail gun for the carpenter's cat and nitros oxide for the dentist's cat. You can get NOS
at any speed shop. Or just borrow a bottle if the Speed shop owner doesn't like cats.

Never quit thinking of ways to unobtrusively get rid of cats or piss off their owners. It takes the boredom
out of life.


RELOAD - ITS FUN!
03 February 2006, 06:48
poletax
Very deep, I'm Humbled.


My Strength Is That I Can Laugh At Myself,
My Weakness Is That I have No Choice.
03 February 2006, 08:42
Bob K
OEH
We do tend to refer to them as stick flickers---But---you Sir have put it exactly right!
BK