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DDRHook and his bushpig

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02 January 2013, 00:24
Miss Lovecraft
DDRHook and his bushpig
Wait, what story? Big Grin


Efter þvi sem gamlir fuglar sungu, kvököu þeir ungu.

Guð hjálpar þeim sem hjálpa sér sjálfir.
02 January 2013, 00:30
Miss Lovecraft
No, go on, Steve! Share with the group. <3


Efter þvi sem gamlir fuglar sungu, kvököu þeir ungu.

Guð hjálpar þeim sem hjálpa sér sjálfir.
02 January 2013, 00:50
shakari
Hmmmmmmmmmm. I think maybe I'll sleep on that suggestion! Wink

Maybe I should save it for my memoirs! rotflmo






02 January 2013, 00:51
Miss Lovecraft
But isn't that what caused the need for it in the first place?

rotflmo


Efter þvi sem gamlir fuglar sungu, kvököu þeir ungu.

Guð hjálpar þeim sem hjálpa sér sjálfir.
02 January 2013, 00:56
Miss Lovecraft
I had no idea that yoghurt could be a great condiment for bacon!

Thoughts, Hook? : )))))


Efter þvi sem gamlir fuglar sungu, kvököu þeir ungu.

Guð hjálpar þeim sem hjálpa sér sjálfir.
02 January 2013, 01:38
shakari
OK then..... as you bear such a startling resemblance to one of my new FB friends, I'll come clean in the hope it might help some poor soul in the future...... but should warn that the following story is not for the faint hearted or those with a weak stomach! Eeker

As many here will know, doxycycline is an excellent anti malarial but it's also an antibiotic that works by killing off bacteria. However, it kills both good and bad bacteria and by killing the good bacteria, one thing that can happen is the person concerned can develop a very bad case of thrush very suddenly so one needs to be very cautious of that if taking doxycycline on a long term basis.

One way to counteract this is by taking live acidophilis tablets that replace the good bacteria........ I, or more accurately, 'er indoors, forgot to buy the damn things so I took off for a longish period of hunting in Tanzania that was due to finish up with a few weeks hunting in the Burigi region next to the Rwanda border without even a thought to the tablets that would have kept me safe.

'Er indoors was due to fly in and meet me for the last of the Burigi hunts, after which, we were due to go to the Ngorongoro Crater Lodge for a few days of R&R. For those that don't know, the Ngorongoro Crater Lodge is known as one of the most romantic places on Earth and a degree of horizontal jogging is almost guaranteed when taking your partner there. Cool

By the time I'd got to Burigi, I was suffering what might be termed a severe itch in the nether regions........ more accurately, my old chap was as sore as hell and looked like someone had gone over the business end with a very sharp cheese grater, & then given it a light going over with a flame thrower.......The pain was absolutely excruciating.

When 'er indoors (who incidentally is a nurse) arrived in the Burigi camp, I immediately took her into the tent, dropped my kaks, flopped it out and said 'what do you think about that then?'

Eeeewwwwww she said, you're bringing that nasty thing near me anytime soon and then collapsed on the floor laughing her head off........ it turned out the antibiotic without the live acidophilis to counteract it had given me an extremely bad case of thrush on the old bell end!

By the time we got to the Ngorongoro Crater lodge, it was even worse and I could hardly walk and 'er indoors suddenly had the brainwave that the 'bush treatment' would be to give the old chap regular soakings in yoghurt at the end of every meal. Consequently I was forced to take the embarrassing steps of taking a pot of fresh yoghurt back to my tent after every meal and stand with the old chap dipped in the yoghurt for half an hour or so. rotflmo jumping rotflmo The only good news was that it worked reasonably well in the short term.

I kid you not when I tell you it took close to a year before the old chap was completely recovered and pain free! Eeker

So gentlemen (and Miss lovecraft) the moral of this story is NEVER forget to take live acidophilis along with your doxycycline when going on safari! Wink

And if you're wise, you'll also take a tube or three of anti thrush cream along as well!

Maybe I could put that in the 'trials and tribulations' chapter of my memoirs? rotflmo

Go on, laugh you bastards! Cool






02 January 2013, 01:55
timg953
Well, I will never look at a bowl of yogurt the same way.
02 January 2013, 02:05
shakari
Me neither! rotflmo






02 January 2013, 02:07
bwana cecil
I may buy yogurt in the future, but not sure I'll be able to eat it.


LORD, let my bullets go where my crosshairs show.
Not all who wander are lost.
NEVER TRUST A FART!!!
Cecil Leonard
02 January 2013, 02:55
timg953
I don't think I will even buy it. Btw, hooker is headed to Dallas tonight. Lock up your livestock!!!!
02 January 2013, 03:00
shakari
I made the mistake of telling Hook the story and he took great delight in passing it onto everyone I know..... esp those with a similar sense of humour........ I went out out with Luan and a few others one day and as is typical, we sat down to shoot the bull over a few beers and a bit to eat and the next thing I knew, the waiter was bringing me a pot of yoghurt....... Luan kept a completely straight face throughout the whole thing! rotflmo

Oh happy days!






02 January 2013, 03:03
shakari
quote:
Originally posted by timg953:
I don't think I will even buy it. Btw, hooker is headed to Dallas tonight. Lock up your livestock!!!!


And your trophies! animal






02 January 2013, 04:21
Elton Rambin
Steve after today's postings perhaps it is a good thing you will not be in Dallas this week.

Perhaps next year under a heavy beard and assumed name.

This has been fun.

A New Year of blessings,dreams fulfilled and adventures to all the AR hunters.
02 January 2013, 05:09
timg953
The Arkansas game and fish dept. Are giving hooker an award for the progress he made in ridding the state of it's over population of wild pigs. It seems, hook didn't kill any, he just molested enough to frighten the rest of them into moving to Oklahoma.
02 January 2013, 05:56
ddrhook
Steve was not so nice to me when i had the nice big boobed blonde lady in Uganda bring him some nice fresh home made yogurt. HE call me mean names and threatened my life!!!!!! and my family jewels too with a duel knife!!!!! rather uncivilized of him don't you agree?????
02 January 2013, 06:27
timg953
Don, Steve was just being friendly. Think of what he would have done if hadn't liked you.
02 January 2013, 12:50
shakari
quote:
Originally posted by timg953:
Don, Steve was just being friendly. Think of what he would have done if hadn't liked you.


Ain't that the truth! Wink






02 January 2013, 17:06
ddrhook
ya a duel skinning knife comes to mind!!!!! shocker
03 January 2013, 01:39
Miss Lovecraft
Clearly, I need to pop on here and stir shit up more often!

Gentlemen, have a good time in Dallas. I will resume duties on the homestead.


Efter þvi sem gamlir fuglar sungu, kvököu þeir ungu.

Guð hjálpar þeim sem hjálpa sér sjálfir.
03 January 2013, 06:22
Penetrater
Don, in the past you have provided us with some great ,, shall we say , necter from the gods,, I will supply a flask this year , wish i had more but with christmas,, the week before christmas, and new years , and the days after new years,,,well i saved some for ya. see ya soon. Markus
03 January 2013, 06:38
bwana cecil
I just thought of something! Wasn't Hook in the movie Deliverance?
SQUEAL LIKE A PIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Beware if you hear Dueling Banjos starting to play when he's around.


LORD, let my bullets go where my crosshairs show.
Not all who wander are lost.
NEVER TRUST A FART!!!
Cecil Leonard
03 January 2013, 06:55
ddrhook
Penetrater,
sounds good we will have plenty to go around between the two of use Big Grin
03 January 2013, 06:56
ddrhook
bawana cecil,
OOOOHHHHHHHH dam that is a new low even for here ouch!!!! if i had a heart or feeling they would be hurt shocker rotflmo rotflmo
03 January 2013, 07:51
timg953
I just walked by don's hotel room and heard dueling banjos!!! Org is in there! I hope he doesn't sleep face down!!!
03 January 2013, 16:01
ddrhook
he sleep's on his back and snores like a chainsaw. ear plugs did not even help and my god the gas he passed would drop and elephant at 50 yrds.
03 January 2013, 16:43
timg953
If that is true, then why was Org wearing gas mask when he came down for breakfast. The poor guy looked shell shocked. I don't want to think of what he saw and experienced.
03 January 2013, 17:05
shakari
I think Hook told me the gas mask is just a fetish so he probably forgot to take it off! jumping

Hope you guys have a happy & successful show! tu2






04 January 2013, 07:55
timg953
Having a great time Steve. Wish you were here just to see don as he gazes wistfully at the bush pigs in the wild life creations display.
04 January 2013, 08:12
jdollar
i always take Doxy for malaria/tick bite fever prophy. THANK GOOD IT HAS NEVER CAUSED THIS PROBLEM!!!!
Big Grin


Vote Trump- Putin’s best friend…
To quote a former AND CURRENT Trumpiteer - DUMP TRUMP
04 January 2013, 17:08
timg953
Me too!!!
05 January 2013, 03:04
bwana cecil
Saw a big azz hat coming my way today & knew it had to be Hooker, & indeed it was!
Good to meet the king of the pork breeders association.


LORD, let my bullets go where my crosshairs show.
Not all who wander are lost.
NEVER TRUST A FART!!!
Cecil Leonard
05 January 2013, 03:16
shakari
Someone needs to lock a chastity belt on him before there's an extremely unpleasant scene at one of the taxidermy booths!

Still, at least all the while there's a pig around, he's got somewhere to hang his hat.....

jumping






05 January 2013, 16:09
timg953
When I saw don last he was liquored up and looking for ham. I will read the police reports in this morning's paper to see if he found any and who it belonged to.
06 January 2013, 16:37
ddrhook
I survived hahahahahahaha unless you figure in all the guys from here who love and covet my hat out of jealously rotflmo
06 January 2013, 17:05
timg953
Don,it isn't that they like your hat, it is that the shade from it shields your face from their Women and children.
07 January 2013, 06:57
bwana cecil
I saw one of the taxidermist having EXIT ONLY tattoed on the backside of his bushpig. Anyone want to geuss why?


LORD, let my bullets go where my crosshairs show.
Not all who wander are lost.
NEVER TRUST A FART!!!
Cecil Leonard
07 January 2013, 12:32
shakari
One of my spies sent me these pics that he took with his secret spy camera. He says the tag around Hook's neck is actually a health warning rather than a show pass!





animal rotflmo jumping rotflmo animal






07 January 2013, 15:30
Scriptus
sus diligo dancing
07 January 2013, 16:30
shakari
Hey, at least they weren't sharing a post copulation cigarette! Eeker jumping






07 January 2013, 16:35
ddrhook
Steve
you know i don't smoke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!